Let's just say losing my car didn't come at the best time and the rain didn't make it easy either. While living in a small coastal city has it's advantages there are are some disadvantages when trying to get yourself to small city far away. Luckily I was able to write a little on the train there but the bus ride home gave no hope for that.
I am always trapped in my mind for these races. There is very little time to really stay in the moment because my mind is wild. it wins 99% of the time. My ego is also a huge problem in these races. I love running but I hate it. There is no greater feeling than pushing myself to what I think are my limits and then seeing myself surpass them. Unfortunately this doesn't happen often. Usually I finish a race and am thinking why the hell wasn't I able to push faster and harder. The saying pain is temporary pride is forever really rings true. I love most cliches and this one is no different. This is why I love running because it wasn't something I was naturally good at and definitely not something I love every moment. While going to this race there were moments of me asking I was even traveling to this place to run. Not much made sense to me.
The course was great for time. It was flat and good views along the water. However, the course isn't the most important. Your mind, nutrition, and body are the most important. Unfortunately, the same learning experiences happen over and over. In almost every race for me regardless. Starting out too fast is a great one of mine. How to overcome this? Logically it is easy but when the gun goes off my idealistic moronic inside goes faster than I should.
30% of the way in is when my wheels started to shake. This is actually much different than usual so a problem but at least a new problem. I just became disinterested and a little sluggish. My legs felt heavy and I started to question again Why? There wasn't much to do besides accepting where I was and to keep moving. Stopping wasn't an option. This is where meditation has helped me the most in running. Body scans and determining pain from being hurt might be the most valuable awareness skill there is.
The funniest part of the race was when I was in a real real real bad place mentally. Just nothing was good. Totally trapped in my own head. Then all of a sudden I came back from my black out to see a camera man laughing at how pitiful I looked. I am trying to get my hands on those shots because they will be the real deal. No smiles. No waving to the fans. It will be what the marathon truly feels like. Not the victory pictures after where it is all sunshine and rainbows. The true grit and the true grime.
This wasn't even the spot where the cameramna caught me in a bad place. I guess I looked mentally beaten the whole race haha.
The true grit and grime is why I love South Korea so much. A lot of the people I meet are at marathons and there is something about a 60 year old Korean(men and WOMEN) charging by me in late in these things that does numerous things at once. It absolutely beasts my ego and throws me down while simultaneously having so much respect for the mental toughness they have.
Maybe a bit of a leap but I feel like the rise of South Korea in the world is really shown through these endurance races. Some people are given a difficult life and some people choose to enter adversity. I can't speak for their lives being difficult or not but they definitely signed up for difficulty when running. The running atmosphere is something I will take with me forever from South Korea.